How to detach...

Detachment is a spiritual value that we want to cultivate. Detachment does not mean being un-loving. In fact, detachment is the ability to love: detachment allows the space for another person, or even for ourselves, to be who we truly are meant to be in this moment, in any moment.

How do I detach? True detachment means detachment - "un-attaching" - from the thoughts in your own mind! Most of us have come to value our thoughts, our opinions, our reactions over anything else. Notice this as you go through the day. What is your reaction - your own thoughts and feelings - to whatever or whoever comes into your path? Your choices are undoubtedly based on what you think about the events or persons you encounter. If you move quickly, you are being ruled by your own thoughts, your own judgments. The world is pretty small in there!

Don't believe everything you think! When we are "attached" to whatever we think, then we can be swayed, this way and that, by whatever we are telling ourselves. When we are "detached," we can begin to choose our responses to any situation or person.

Try this: sit for a few moments and notice yourself, whole, as you truly are. Feel yourself sitting on the chair. Be aware of your senses: what do you feel, what do you hear, what do you see, what do you smell? Then, be aware of your mind. What is your mind, what are your thoughts saying right now?

Most of the time when I decide to sit for a few moments, my mind goes into high gear, and I begin to think about all the things I could be doing if I just got out of the chair! I've learned that my mind always has something it would like me to do!

As you practice "watching" your thoughts, seeing them for what they are, simply thoughts, you will begin, mysteriously, to detach. You will begin to slow down to look at your thoughts and to decide from one moment to the next which thoughts you will act upon. You may find you get angry less often, once you "discover" the thought that brings you to anger. You may find that you are more patient with yourself and others.
That's love.
Warmly,
meb